a first for me

I had to run to the grocery store this afternoon for a few items I had forgotten. Sam came with me so Chris could go for a bike ride before the sun went down.

Anyway, while I was walking to the check out Samantha started screaming. There was not much I could do, I wasn't going to take her out of her seat because we were going to check out and then go right back in the car. As I approached the check out she was still crying and I soon realized that pretty much everyone in the store was staring at me! I tried talking to Sam, giving her the pacifier, and swinging the seat but she did not want to be sitting and wouldn't stop crying; people continued to stare. I started to feel like I was doing something wrong, in some way neglecting my child or being a bad parent. People continued to stare. It was my turn to check out and she was still crying. The check out lady stared at Sam and then I swear I felt like she was glaring at me! What was I suppose to do? Clearly people could see that she was actually fine, not being hurt in any way, she just didn't want to be sitting and wanted to cry. That was the most uncomfortable, awkward trip to the grocery store EVER.

What are moms suppose to do in that situation? Do you ask people to stop staring? Do you pretend like you are talking loudly to your baby and say something like "Oh please stop crying so all these crazy people will stop staring at me?" Anyone else ever experienced the horribly judgmental stares of strangers?

Oh well, we survived.

snow day

Well, we have been enjoying our snow day to the best of my ability. I have been working on projects, mostly addressing birth announcements (watch your mailbox!). After a projective vomit last night and several not so pleasant poops today I also decided it was a bath day. I was going to attempt to shoot a bath video today, but she was so calm in the bath that the video was really rather boring. But here are some cute bath time pictures.

With this much hair you have to use a lot of shampoo and really scrub!

Love those baby feet!

This is during our pj party protest. Sam is just hanging out on daddy's pillow (in case she needed to throw up again! just kidding) in an outfit that is still a bit too big.
I love baby ears, but Sam's are disappearing! I think a hair cut might actually be necessary.

frustrated!

I am frustrated that I do not know why my baby cries. A friend of mine figured out that soda and dairy products caused her son to be very gassy and upset, so she stopped eating/drinking those foods and suddenly her son was no longer fussy. She says he is a perfect baby now. I want a perfect baby. But how do people know what makes them not feel good? When you eat a sandwich with chicken, tomato, lettuce, cheese and ranch dressing how do you know which part of it made them projectile throw up and be fussy all night? I don't know if I am not watching what I eat closely enough or what. And I don't know if I really have a fussy baby or if she is normal and I just don't know it cause I have nothing to compare it to. I feel like she cries for no reason a lot but maybe this is nothing compared to a colicky baby. I am frustrated.
I am also frustrated because I woke up to this.
And just in case you can't tell just how much, look at this.
And it is not stopping. So Sam and I are stagging a protest and staying in bed until the snow stops. We are having a pj party protest! Mother Nature if you are reading this I am not getting out of bed until you bring back Spring!

good grip

Our little girl has developed quite a grip! She can hold on to our fingers pretty good but the thing she can hold on to the best is my shirt when she is feeding. For some reason she grabs hold and never wants to let go. She really holds on for dear life! We have tried giving her very light toys or her pacifier to hold to she if she can lift and hold onto things yet, but so far she is sticking with just my shirt!

news and updates

So tonight I went to a Wild Edibles lecture and hike at a local reserve. The event only lasted an hour and a half but I have to say that when I got back home I realized that I had actually missed Samantha. I missed her...after only an hour and a half! I didn't think that could be possible but it happened. I am so glad I am not a mom that has to go back to work right away, I just can't even imagine how hard that must be.
The timing of my event tonight kind of stunk and I knew that Sam was going to be hungry while I was gone. I had pumped a little today and told Chris he might have to give her a bottle for the first time while I was gone. So I was very anxious to see first how she would do with the bottle and then how she would do on the boob after having a bottle...she did great with both. Chris said the bottle went fine, since it was just him here we don't have any pictures of her taking a bottle for the first time. And I fed her tonight again and she had no problem feeding on the boob after having the bottle. Exciting stuff cause this means that some night soon we could go out for wonderful Mexican and I can "pump-and-dump"! Life changing news for us. Fajitas and guacamole here I come!

Lastly, I have news about my duck, Mabel. If you remember Mabel was building a nest in our planter box next to our front door. She is not really "my" duck, just a wild Mallard that has nested in our planter box before and came back this year. She had 12 eggs and had begun her sitting on the nest until the eggs hatched. Well now she is gone. After an incident with a stray black cat, Polly (our golden retriever), myself and Chris the duck has left the nest and been gone for five days; I don't think she is coming back or that the eggs are still okay. So sad. I wanted to kill the stupid cat that started the whole ridiculous mess and crazy chasing scene. Chris is going to deal with the eggs for me so I don't have to look at them anymore (I have no idea what he is going to do with them and I don't want to know) and clean up the nest. Just wanted to update you all on the sad news of Mabel.

Okay, those are my updates and news. Sorry no pictures this post.

spying!

Today I feel like I am spying on my daughter. We are trying out sleeping in the crib, on her back, NOT in the bouncy seat. She loves having covers on her so I have to put a blanket on her when she is laying down; which I know is a no-no when they are this little. So, I am constantly checking on her making sure that she is okay and that the blanket is still in the right place.
As I tip-toe into her room to look into the crib I feel like I am spying on my daughter. Clearly she doesn't care or know the difference but I can just picture her screaming at me one day "mom get out of my room!" the way I use to yell at my mom. So while she can't yell at me I decided to really spy on her and take a picture of her successfully napping in her crib!And yes I know that it looks like her eyes are open and that she isn't a sleep, but that is just how she sleeps sometimes, eyes partly open.

Bad Thought

Today a thought entered my mind that I wasn't expecting and didn't like...being a mom can be boring. Isn't that horrible? I feel like such a bad mom, a bad person really, for thinking that. Moms should love being moms and enjoy being moms; but today I just didn't feel that way. It's just that there are only so many things you can do with an infant. It was raining most of the day so I couldn't go for a long walk like I have been the last few days to kill some time and get out of the house. And the times when she is sleeping and will let me put her down I feel like I need to get stuff done but laundry, dishes and straightening up aren't really all that exciting either. So today I just felt bored.

But I did try some new things to pass the time. When it wasn't raining we sat outside and I talked to Samantha about the birds and ducks that we saw. She really seemed to like being outside; she was awake and not fussy!
We also got out the playmat that Jodie gave me and although Samantha is still too young to really enjoy it she stayed calm for at least a few minutes. It was funny because her hands and legs were moving a lot and she would hit the toys handing over her head totally by accident. I thought it was pretty cute and decided to video tape her a bit.

So the day is over and I made it. Hopefully tomorrow will be nice out and we can go for a walk, run errands or spend more time outside to make it a better day.

But Sam is still adorable when she sleeps!